Friday, December 26, 2008

Found Interesting

 Once upon a time , there was a little girl who lived in Brooklyn, because all of the really interesting stories start in Brooklyn. She had no magic at all, but none of the things that were magical really believed that, because when their world broke apart she would hold enough pieces of it together that they thought it was magic. But it wasn't magic, it was work.

The little girl grew up knowing she had no magic , and she was pretty sure that no one else did either. Which meant that when she grew up and got married she didn't realize that sometimes legends are true, and the fae could bend and steal time.  She would have made sure to have a rule against marrying such creatures had she known. She went there unknowing and when she left that realm, everything was different.  Her own world had broken apart and she worked very, very hard to put enough pieces of it back together again. 

There are no Jewish Faeries, so she was pretty sure that if her children had any relationships with Jolly Old Elves it would have to be through her mother, who kept regular correspondence with magical things, or their father when they visited that realm where magic was real.  And for years that was so, until the year it wasn't, and the poor confused Elf paid a call to a house with a fireplace and a tree that lived in it. But the tree had a vulture, and the lights were all candles. He was invited in, although hesitantly, because she was holding together her children's broken world and it was still having it's glue set. 

That was the year they learned. 

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, 
surprised, since there had been no stockings planned there,
While Santa has stopped by for good girls and boys, 
There were hints of something else in the toys. . . . 

That year there were signs of happy snarkiness, and counterculture items that could not possibly be Santa approved. Black leather cuffs and Bunnys telling people to throw rocks. And thus they discovered that the Stockings had been infiltrated by Aunti Claus,  Santa's cooler rebellious younger sister, who hangs with dwarves that work at West Coast.

Santa Claus visits all the good little boys and girls, 
Aunti Claus visits all the interesting ones.

 (Yes, it is prounounced "Anti". That's because she spends a lot of time in NYC and because she likes it that way)

The next year Santa came again with mysterious stockings and behavior based rewards, but Aunti broke in too, and rearranged The Taunting - putting the 8th night presents in the stockings and breaking the house rules giving the children matching Ipods. That was when they learned the other part of Aunti's MO:

Aunti Claus gives you the presents that your parents don't approve of. 

On the third year the broken world was set, the woman who had no magic wanted to celebrate with her mother, the children's grandmother, who was the family's connection to the Tooth Fairy and Santa, and House Brownies. The youngest child was concerned . . . . Would Aunti Claus be able to find them at Grandma's house where everything was good and properly Christmassy? Could Grandma ban Aunti from coming in like all of the other questionable magic types? Grandma was very powerful.

That was the year they learned their third truth about Aunti:

Aunti Claus is a Ninja 
She comes in through the front door, you just don't know it. 
Not even Grandma.

That chimney stuff might mess up her outfit. Santa covered the living room in Christmas splendor - Aunti found a cool little blue and silver tree in the dining room,hung out her stockings filled with in-jokes and sarcasm, and left two working light sabers underneath the understated yet diva-like tree. The light side of the force was for the boy, and the dark side of the force for the girl because after all, the girl had the T-Shirt "Come to the Dark Side, we have Cookies"

The Children are older, the world is slightly more brittle, and if the young boy is asked the immortal question, "Do you believe in Santa Claus," he looks at you with Faerie Ninja eyes and smiles a secret holding smile. He answers, " I believe in Aunti Claus"

And Aunti Claus believes in him, because this year, there was no sign of Santa at the home of the Woman with No Magic, but there were Poppets in the Trees for her, Diseases in Petri Dishes and Extra Brain Cells for the children, Sharp and Unsafe Objects for everyone, Devil Ducks and Tiny Power Tools to be shared by the child and his mother. The daughter was was gifted with Software the Mother Did Not Approve Of and the ability to draw pictures with air and electrons. Everyone in the family was Found Interesting this year. Even the Perfectly Normal Stepfather, who got a collectors edition Red Swingline Stapler.

It is clear that Aunti Claus supports the Embarrassed Embassy Project.

They reveled in the binary of it all, then  packed up to travel over the river and through the woods to Grandmother's house, where Santa still behaved as expected. Just because her children were Interesting, didn't mean they weren't Good.

1 comment:

unelaborated said...

Beautiful. Simply beautiful.